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before internship, I couldn't discipline myself to keep a schedule, I… - Daniel Arnold [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Daniel Arnold

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[Sep. 9th, 2005|08:20 pm]
Daniel Arnold
before internship, I couldn't discipline myself to keep a schedule,
I couldn't stop drinking,
I kept returning to smoking,
and falling in pornography,
not getting enough sleep,
never exercising,
couldn't discipline myself to read the Bible,
always wasting time,
feeling lazy.

Now, I feel like I'm wasting time just writing this reflection...
Like I will cause a cataclysmic event if I drink one beer,
Like I must go to bed at 10 because no matter what I'll still wake up like I got no sleep,
Like I must carry a water bottle at all times,
Eat three healthy meals a day,
Like I don't have enough energy for lust,
Like the Bible is there to keep me alive,
Like I'm infinitely behind no matter what,
always walking to and from school and college-- sometimes as much as 60 minutes a day.

Like I don't have to worry about wasting another Saturday,
because it's already booked with tuition payments, cascades of homework, required housework, and even a 2-3 hour visit to the elementary school.

This is my life.

[User Picture]From: lyrafleur
2005-09-10 02:39 am (UTC)
Amen to that....

Don't get discouraged, you are doing all this for the Will of God, something greater than your own. That means even when you think you are wasting your time, God is using it in awesome ways.

You thought you were wasting time writing this reflection, but it somehow brings me a bit of encouragement. I've been extremely busy, wasting what little free time I have on things that don't mean a thing and then getting frustrated beyond belief. Then again... am I wasting time on the little things? Perhaps, let God be the judge. ;)

Have a good weekend.
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